Tip for people calling tech support

[Orrex]

When the tech support professional gives you instructions, shut up and follow the instructions.

Additionally, if he tells you to push the button three times, push the button three times. Not once. Not twenty times. Three times.

[Duer 157099]

1. I do that when I have an hour or two to spare

If they sound like they are reading a script, I ask for their supervisor so I can get a real answer quickly.

[Orrex]

5. Here's how a recent call went:

Customer: My system isn't working.

Me: Sir, type in your three-digit code and press enter.

Customer, typing: beep-beep-beep-beep-beep-beep-beep-beep-beep-beep-beep-beep.

Me: Uh, what did you type? I heard a lot of beeps.

Customer: I typed what you told me. My system's not working.

[HipChick]

8. I have already done that..

and I proceed to them how long I've been in IT...that's when they get nasty and testy with me...

[ZombieHorde]

2. What's the fun in that? nt

[mythology]

3. Additional tips

When you see an error message, take a screen shot prior to calling the help desk. It's a lot harder to troubleshoot "there was an error message" than the actual error message.

Also when they ask what you did, please be explicit. If you had a problem when browsing the internet, specify the browser for example. Or provide the exact steps to reproduce something. It's hard to trouble shoot "I didn't do anything, it just stopped working" than it is to have I did step 1, 2, 3.

[GoneOffShore]

4. In addition - RYFM

Read Your Freaking Manual.

[Orrex]

6. Yes indeed

Not long ago I learned what turns out to be a pretty well-known abbreviation: PESCAC


Sums it up pretty nicely.

[GoneOffShore]

9. Not familiar with that one.

[Orrex]

10. Neither was I, until a friend spelled it out for me

Problem Exists Between Chair And Computer.

[HarveyDarkey]

11. That's PEBCAC

Also "ID ten T", write the 10 in numerals. Used both frequently when I worked in IT.

[Orrex]

12. GODDAMN SMARTPHONE!!!!!!!!

And shame on me for missing a typo. Doh!
Time to call tech support!

[Paulie]

14. I always saw that as PEBCAK

In networking its called a layer 8 problem.

[Paulie]

13. RTFM

[Paulie]

7. I started answering the phone like the IT Crowd:

Hello IT, have you tried turning it off and on?

[Incitatus]

15. heh, reminds me of this

http://www.cracked.com/video_18480_5-reasons-guy-fixing-your-computer-hates-you.html

I've yet to encounter a problem I needed to call tech support to fix. Thanks to having more than 1 computer that I can use to access the Internet.

[Orrex]

16. LOL. Yeah. Another one:

Me: I'll be happy to help. Can you tell me what your system says right now?

Customer: I can't see it. It's downstairs.

Me: Okay. Can you get there while we're on the phone together?

Customer: No, the cord won't reach.

[Aristus]

17. Whatever you do, don't post this in General Discussion.

This is a sample of the responses you can expect:

1. How dare you tell people who need Tech support what to do? What kind of a heartless jerk are you?!

2. Yeah, last time, I pressed the button FOUR times, and got it to work. So you don't really know what you're talking about, do you?

3. I never listen to tech support. You guys don't know what you're doing!"

4. I know this guy! He claims to be tech support. But I know who he is! He sells laptops at Bytes 'R' us. He doesn't really know anything.

5. If I had computer problems, I'd never take thme to an arrogant jerk like you!

6. You know, viruses aren't really bad for computers. Why do you lie to users like that?

Just a warning.

I love the tech support guys. Couldn't get through my day without 'em!

[blueamy66]

18. Here's a tip for those that run a tech support company...

If you offer an option to get help in English, please provide an IT tech who speaks it clearly.

Thank you.

[OffWithTheirHeads]

20. No shit! In this day and age, when people ask what extra language they should consider

I used to tell them Spanish would be the one they would get the most use from but after the last few weeks calling corporations to tell them I am moving, I think Pashtun would be a better choice.

[Orrex]

19. Also, when the tech support professional asks you what the screen indicates...

Tell the tech support professional what the screen indicates! Not half of what the screen says, not a rough paraphrase of what the screen says.

[hobbit709]

21. Had a call from a friend yesterday.

She was in a panic because a 9 page form attachment from her attorney wouldn't open and print. She kept trying to print the email and not the PDF attachment.
When I finally got her to slow down enough to follow my instructions EXACTLY, she got it to open. She kept trying to get two clicks ahead of what I was telling her to do.
Then it didn't do anything when she tried to print it. After 5 minutes of WTF, she goes"OH!, I still have the printer connected to the laptop instead of the desktop."