Republican Prayers
http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/shouts/2013/03/shouts-murmurs-republican-prayers-humor.html?intcid=obnetwork
Here is the Caucus Prayer, and there are more
Caucus Prayer
The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.
He endorseth my talking points and gerrymandereth my electoral boundaries.
He leadeth me in paths of wisdom and righteousness and pressureth me to sign pledges that ensure this righteousness.
And woe be unto him that welcheth on his pledge
For not only shall he be cast into the wilderness,
But he shall findeth himself opposed by a well-financed challenger
In the subsequent primary.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death;
And scale the mountain of debt;
And tiptoe to the precipice of fiscal cataclysmI will fear no evil:
For thou art with us,
And more importantly,
Leverage is leverage;
Am I right?
Amen.