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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsHow To Discuss HIV Health Issues With Non-Poz Folks **PSA**
Social situations relating to HIV are confusing, and not just to those who are free of the virus. When I first tested positive four years ago, finding mutually beneficial ways to comport myself and healthily interact with those not living with HIV was a murky and unknown topic that has taken me a long time to understand.
Ive learned mostly through trial and error. But being on the receiving end of problematic statements and behaviors highlighted many boundaries that I hadnt initially considered; societys stigma taught me the etiquette that I prefer in negotiating interpersonal relationships with sero-negative people.
In previous installments of this series on HIV etiquette, we discussed how to react when one finds out their crush is HIV-positive and how to support a newly infected friend. These pieces are great for one-time (if extremely difficult) situations. But its also important that we talk about the best ways to discuss HIV with those who have it, or how better to relate to an HIV-positive person over the course of your association with them.
Just for context, this piece was inspired by a question posed to me by a good friend. He and I have a mutual acquaintance who is living with the virus, and the last time my friend saw this acquaintance he had noticed some changes in their body. They seemed bloated and had lost weight in the face. My friend was concerned... Is our acquaintance sick? He asked me, Is it appropriate for me to comment and how do I express concern without coming off as offensive?
http://www.hivplusmag.com/wellness/2013/04/15/how-discuss-hiv-health-issues-non-poz-folks
I highly recommend reading the full article. Very informative.
Warpy
(110,900 posts)even with other HIV positive people because there are different strains of the virus.
HIV is out there, especially in the gay population in this country, because the gay population got hit first and hardest. You really need to assume any new lover is HIV positive. You really need to assume you might have become infected since your last negative test if you did anything sexual without a condom.
Yes, condoms don't feel good. However, a minor loss in pleasure is better than killing a lover. Or dying, yourself.
And if you're worried about civilians, make friends with people in medicine. We're all used to dealing with HIV and we know it's a virus, not a moral failing or judgment from a punitive god any more than a case of the flu is.
I'm delighted HIV has become a chronic illness instead of an immediate death sentence. However, with that comes the responsibility of keeping it from spreading.