Audrie Pott Suicide: Dead After Inauguration Day

[DonViejo]

by Michael Daly Apr 14, 2013 4:45 AM EDT

Audrie Pott, who killed herself after an alleged gang rape, was in Obama's inaugural parade—and so was another 15-year-old who died four months later. Michael Daly report

At eleven, Audrie Pott of California was in the color guard of the only middle school band to march in President Obama’s first inaugural parade.

“The President’s young daughters waved and cheered loudest for [this] group as all the other performers were so much older,” says a Pott family online posting about the Redwood Middle School’s moment in history.

At fifteen, Audrie committed suicide, eight days after a group of boys she thought were her friends allegedly gang raped her while she was unconscious and distributed at least one photo from the attack online.

“My life is like ruined now,” Audrie announced to the internet prior to hanging herself.

That was last September, four months before a 15-year-old from Chicago named Hadiya Pendleton performed as a majorette with her high school at Obama’s second inauguration. She was killed a week later, when a teen fired wildly in the direction of her and a group of her friends, mistakenly believing they were associated with a rival gang.

With the deaths of these two 15-year-olds, each of whom had played a part in an inauguration, a challenge now marches past the Capitol and the White House and every place on past in this country where laws are made, along with every school and home. The challenge for us all is to find better ways to protect our kids, be it from gun violence or from sexual violence.

more:
http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2013/04/14/audrie-pott-suicide-dead-after-inauguration-day.html

[libodem]

1. So tragic

So many dangers in this life. How do we educate our kids to be safe? From, guns to cars to sex and drugs, it is all so alluring and so lethal.

[redqueen]

2. Rape. Audrie needed protection from rapists. From gang rape. Not the 'allure' of sex.

[libodem]

3. Drinking and drugs also play a part

Don't get too drunk and fucked up with a bunch of guys. But of course I blame the boys. They were probability drunk or high. I don't think this horrible stuff happens in a vacuum.

I'm NOT blaming the victim. Sorry to hear you are against drivers training, sex education, and honest education about drug use and abuse. Just leave those loaded guns around the house, for the kids okay?

[bettyellen]

7. oh please. when you react to gang rape by referring to the allure of sex

(instead of raping an unconscious person) you are going to get push back, and rightfully so.
Coming from the perps family and lawyers, it;s expected, otherwise it's a bullshit way to characterize - and minimize -what actually happened.
Nothing to do with drug abuse or sex education at all. You framing is this as sex is totally fucked up.

[libodem]

10. Young women should be exposed to education about the possibility of gang rape before it actually

Becomes a reality. Boys should be taught as well about group think, being out of their minds drunk and high, having a naked drunk girl, they have no respect for, and a camera. Bad combination. Maybe, these senseless suicides can be used to educate, teach empathy, and self control, or not even getting into such a dangerous situation.

I still think it is true that girls want love even in high school. They think sex may help them get it. Boys want sex and they will use love to get that. I think the lines are blurred when one is young and naive.

We are not supposed to touch alcohol until we are 21 in America. Then we are expected to use it only socially and never to get drunk. Never try drugs. Never have any longing or desire, remain virgins until marriage. I think all of those are unrealistic.

In Europe they drink wine at the table cut with water. The kids learn to drink responsibly. In countries where drugs are legal use actually goes down, kids get educated. They can see if you get addicted to heroin, you pay through the nose to keep the withdrawal away, or you OD. They have a clue. We can't and don't talk about sex, in our families, at church or at school. Both sexes need to know about anatomy, physiology, and birth control. It needs to be out in the open, made less secretive, because the shame of it can cause your ultimate death.

Yes, it is so shameful one would rather be dead. That needs re-education, too. If a rape, or a gang rape happens, some psychological help, needs to be available. These girls do not need to be blamed, having someone say it is not your fault is like a warm towel when you are shivering.

America needs a comprehensive sex ed plan included in our 8th grade health class. And both sexes should be prepared to use the word no and understand it.

[bettyellen]

11. it appears you are assuming this girl wanted affection from one of the four rapists? WTF?

sorry, while I agree education is needed, that jumped out at me. and it's damned offensive to go on and prattle about teen girls using sex to get love while referring to a situation involing the rape of an unconscious person. That's what we expect to hear from sleazy defense lawyers, not other DUers.

[libodem]

13. I'm speaking in generalities

Not her as an individual. I have no clue about her particular motives and I will not speculate. I'm interested in how we could begin to reverse what seems to be a trend amongst teens.

I'd also like to see safe houses and counselling for girls and women rescued from sex rings. They need to rebuild self esteem, manage and cope with guilt and shame, and be reassured it is not their fault either. It would take a recovery program on the order of AA.

You can go ahead and hate on me. I wish you knew my story before you do, though. Too bad I could never trust anyone so mean and judgemental to share it with.

[Lizzie Poppet]

24. How to reverse this trend? Severe negative reinforcement is one component.

Along with far, far better efforts at educating boys on what is and is not acceptable behavior (to counteract some of the stunningly awful influences available to them...have a peep at 4chan /b/ to get an idea), severe punishment of those who do commit these felonies could certainly act as a deterrent. Try them as adults, issue genuinely meaningful, decade-plus sentences, and place them on sex offender registries for life.

Severe? Tough shit. It's not remotely as severe as I'd prefer, to be blunt.

[bettyellen]

25. When she was passed out- did it matter to anyone what this girl wanted? sex, affection- anything??

not hating on you- just pointing out that your posts appear to be making assumptions....and it's reading a bit blame the victimish.

Mean and judgmental? Seriously you need to think about what you post- this girl wasn't looking for affection from all four of her assailants. It's disgusting to imply that someone "wanting affection" is somehow relevant to the motives of horrible little criminals.

[YoungDemCA]

9. +1000

[seabeyond]

14. yes. i do not get why this is so confusing to too many. nt

[dkf]

4. This is definitely a danger that girls need to be warned about.

Drinking to the point of passing out leaves them in a very vulnerable position. I'm wondering if its even safe to sleep over in a hotel room with their male friends as we did for prom.

What a painful cautionary tale.

[libodem]

5. Very

Self esteem, good sex ed, drug education, having some idea about love and crushes, and boys need to learn respect for women, from their families. So many homes don't have a dad. My sons didn't. But somehow they barely ever dated, cared about not hurting someone emotionally, cared about not having their own hearts broken, went to Young Life and Awanas, for socializing. I was lucky.

[haikugal]

6. Girls can be drugged

and often are. So can women...it's part of the rapist toolkit.

[YoungDemCA]

8. I never met Audrie, but I know a few kids who knew her...

And I remember hearing the news about her suicide.

I also remember hearing that "bullying" was involved in her decision to take her life, but I didn't know the full extent of just how horrible the ordeal she went through was.

I am convinced-these are not isolated incidents. There's something profoundly sick and wrong in our national culture. These heinous crimes against girls and women-and against humanity and human decency, for what it's worth-have got to stop. But so too, the way we talk about rape and violence has to change radically, if we are to tackle the systemic roots of this problem.

RIP, Audrie, and other victims of sexual violence. One day, there will be justice-and not just on the individual level, but on the broader social level as well.

[libodem]

12. The profound shame and guilt surrounding sex

Makes it so hard to acknowledge that our children have an interest in it, whatsoever. The facts of life talk is so uncomfortable that it may happen once and never be brought up again. It really should be an honest open, and ongoing discussion.

[seabeyond]

16. why... why the fuck are you talking, sex, crushes, desire, love... in fuckin gang rape....

thru out this whole thread? what is your point? what is your agenda?

GANG RAPE

[libodem]

18. That seems to be your agenda, dear

Not mine. I'd like to see prevention, and some resolution.
Why does it happen and how do we stop it?

I hate having it in general discussion. I wish it stayed in the groups out of sight. Until then I'll say it is not the victims fault, no matter what. None of you debaters from HOF, seem to hear that. You just want to argue.

What is with the preoccupation of thinking about such a sordid subject, all the time? Is there some unconscious driver to wallow in filth and degregation all the time without discussing how to stop it.

I hate the rape threads and should not even participate in them but I put myself out there.
Now, I have you attacking me and dividing us into camps of one side or the other. You can't even acknowledge that I'm on the same side as you because you would rather argue.

I don't want to fight with you. I hate rape as much as anyone. There are prevention methods. It takes openness and education.

[seabeyond]

19. this is a GANG rape thread, that you are participating in, reducing it to allure, love, crushes.

that is the issue.

i am well aware you do not "like" rape threads. who the fuck does. and no, reducing it to fantasy entertainment does not take away from the disgusting brutality of it and the fuckin ANOTHER loss of another girl.

[libodem]

20. Those are the things that drive girls to make themselves available

It needs to be brought up and talked about. Maybe it starts out just wanting to party and get high with the guys. You need to be aware of the start point to see and understand the trajectory of where it all ends up. Even a puff of todays weed, when you haven't tried it before, can fuck up children's judgement. It needs to be talked about. The boys need the education not to lose their judgement either, because they are drunk and high, and have peer pressure. Especially the boys. How do we reach them. Even using their self interest in not having a sex offender, child rapist label from age 16, on should appeal to the intellect of these kids. Being a father, with 18 years of child support, and no parental rights, should be a deterrent. The impact of being a sleezebag should be made clear before they participate in such a scummy act. They are not thinking this stuff through. They are not prepared to consider the consequences of their decision making.

Forewarned is forearmed.

[YoungDemCA]

21. "that drive girls to make themselves available..."

Please explain what you mean by this, because I'm not entirely sure you realize how this is coming across.

[bettyellen]

32. I'd love some clarification on what she thinks they are "making themselves available" for...

and how that connects to the OP.

[bettyellen]

26. you reduce gang rape to boys ALSO losing "their judgement" - you equate rape with drinking??

big WTF over here. Sorry. So wrongheaded, I can;t even begin....

[polly7]

27. With regard to rape though,

making it clear that rape or assault in any form is a criminal act and will be treated accordingly each and every time, is the only thing that many of them will absorb. imho. Schools, LE, communities need to stop treating girls who've been raped, as victims of anything other than victims of the horrible, vicious, vile crime it is. No excuses, no second chances.

[sufrommich]

29. Your responses are inappropriate for a thread

on rape and suicide.This isn't about "girls making themselves available" unless you think passed out drunk at a party means "available". The lesson needs to be to boys who rape and their adult enablers that their alcohol and drug intake at a party isn't an excuse for rape and a girl's alcohol and drug intake at a party isn't an invitation to rape.It's really not that hard to grasp,teach or punish by law.

[Sheldon Cooper]

33. Your comments in this thread are wildly inappropriate.

[bettyellen]

31. if you think clarifying that gang rape has nothing to do with teen crushes is an "agenda"

rather than common fucking sense I don't know what to say to you.

Stop listing excuses for rapists, for fucks sake. There AREN'T ANY excuse for rape. None.

[bettyellen]

28. it's bizarre that she imagines the naked girl and camera just happened like magic

and the boys were high, couldn't stop themselves. Sounds like the story they tell their Moms....

[seabeyond]

30. sounds like the fuckin boys will be boys, raging hormone, out of control, cant help themselves shit.

again.

it is the smae old garbage that has put us here. ignore, dismiss, hide, be ignorant, anything to not address the brutality of the issue of what our society is creating because then we may have to actually accept part of the responsibility in all this ugliness.

and still

another girl lost.

[YoungDemCA]

23. Rape is not really about sex

Why is this so hard to understand?

[seabeyond]

15. rape has become an entertainment for us all, and especially our young. hmmmm. wonder. and yes,

I am convinced-these are not isolated incidents.

especially as there are so many adults that want to ignore, do not want it touching their "beautiful life", are just so damn ignorant on what is happening in society and demand that they stay ignorant, as we are told to be quiet cause they do not want to hear or deal with the issue.

we are failing, our kids.

[pansypoo53219]

17. when did unconscious become a green light?

[libodem]

22. Can you imagine

What kind of sociopath could even get it up for such an act. They have to have some borderline personality disorder to have such a lack of empathy and to need no reaction from the object they must view the female as.

Necrophilla is the next closest act after screwing a nearly lifeless person. It really is a callous disregard for humanity.

I've had enough of this shit. I need a shower.

[Initech]

34. Damn. What a sick society we live in.