Next Step in Kansas: Life Begins at Menarche

[MineralMan]

I suspect that what Kansas legislators and fundamentalist right-wing creeps want is for every young girl, beginning with her first menstrual period, to be monitored for reproductive behavior. That monitoring will continue until menopause. Women will have to record their menstrual cycles and sexual activity and submit monthly calendars showing those cycles and activity. Any irregularity will prompt a mandatory examination by an approved medical professional and if a pregnancy is detected, the pregnant girl or woman will have to report weekly to their local Pregnancy Maintenance Center, where every aspect of their pregnancy will be monitored.

Further, to prevent illegal contraceptive practices, no contraceptive medications or devices will be able to be sold in Kansas, with strict inspections of all vehicles entering Kansas to prevent unlawful transport of contraceptive materials into the state, even by tourists, should any tourist really want to come there.

All physicians will be closely monitored, as well, and will have to attend monthly training in detecting and preserving all pregnancies. Any physician performing any abortion, D&C, or recommending or supplying any contraceptive medication or device will be held without trial for an indeterminate time.

Finally, no woman in the State of Kansas will be allowed to leave the state during the time between menarche and menopause, to assure that she will have no access to contraceptive or reproductive health care in any neighboring state. Violation of this travel restriction will lead to placement in a Reproductive Maintenance Facility operated by a religious organization.

Welcome to The New State of Kansas!

[Demo_Chris]

1. God wills it

[smirkymonkey]

2. No way. This can not happen.

WTF is WRONG with Kansas?

[MineralMan]

3. This is extending the new Kansas law

that has life beginning at conception to its logical extreme. No such legislation has been proposed.

[kestrel91316]

64. Oh, give it time. Because this is what they want.

Women are reproductive slaves to them.

[awoke_in_2003]

21. Yes, it can...

one tiny little step at a time. The fundies are patient.

[southernyankeebelle]

28. Every time I would post something about what the religious right was going to do many people

didn't believe me. I told them that they are a patient group and will start at the local level like Sarah Palin did. They take over school boards. Then local offices, states office untile they get to take over the congress and senate. This is going on now. I remember when reading about the 7 mountains (that is going on even now). A quiver family (look at the Duggar family) and home school of religious families. It is scary stuff. These people are no better than the Telaban. They will if given the chance put this country on a christain sharia law. We have to be careful and pay attention

[awoke_in_2003]

31. Yep, scary indeed. nt

[calimary]

39. This is it, exactly. Anybody still doubting? Do some reading on ralph reed.

He was out there DECADES ago - during reagan - preaching the gospel of starting by running for school board. Nobody cares. A few votes in the standard low-turnout elections are all you need to get elected. And THEN, you're IN! Then you start building. Alliances, connections, name recognition, media friendlies, and you help your fellow religious nutcases in, too - while your own power base helps you build your own momentum. Next top: city council or alderman or whatever. Then: Congress. Then, Senate or the governor's mansion. And then - hey why not go for the big one? OR make friends with all the potential big ones so you get nominated for some high appointee job - Supreme Court maybe?

It IS going on at this very moment. It's an infiltration. A vile sort of "peaceful" takeover. Systemic, from the ground up. It's been going on since the 70s and 80s. reagan just opened the floodgates and gave them all cover, as well as one of those "friends in high places." The teabaggers are doing the same thing. So are the misogynists and American Taliban in the states - targeting women's reproductive rights. So are the Roe v Wade haters. So are the why-do-blacks-need-voter-protections fiends. And they move from state to state, metastasizing like a cancer. It's underway at this very moment. It's in full flower at this very moment. And they will not be stopped. They ARE patient. And they're ALWAYS thinking, always maneuvering, always sneaking, always moving targets. They're ALWAYS on it.

And OUR side, on the other hand, is really only just starting to wake up.

[MineralMan]

51. Our side is not really as good at actually doing things like

running for local offices, frankly. We're better at discussing things in a more abstract way and withholding our participation when things don't go as we wish. More's the pity.

[southernyankeebelle]

58. Just google 7 mountains and you will see that they are already inflatring. The military, school

boards, local offices. Communications (like right wing talk radio and Fox News). The churchs just about finished now. They want to destroy any liberal idea that made this country great. Put us under christain rule.

[calimary]

78. Yeah, I've seen some of that. Scares the bejezus outta me, pardon the pun.

[southernyankeebelle]

80. honey, it scares the crap out of me too. We all must spread the word and tell people to google

7 mountains. Enough said.

[Lunacee_2013]

87. I was just about to ask what "7 mountains" means.

I have been paying some attention to the fundies' local government takeover tactics, but I've never heard about the 7 mountains thing. So now its off to the google machine for me.!

[southernyankeebelle]

98. Come back after and tell us what you think when you read it. It's enough to scare the shit out of

a person. Because it has been happening and many people have their eyes closed to it. The religious right is already powerful enough. We must be able to stop the takeover. Now I believe in god but I believe in separation of church and state. When I tell people to go to google and google 7 mountains is because you can get alot there but it gets to the basics.

[kestrel91316]

65. most on the left may be asleep to the danger right now, but we'll always have hemlock.

They will only get away with just so much. They think they can take us back a thousand years. Some of us will refuse to let that happen.

[RKP5637]

76. It is the Christian Taliban, but many close their ears. I live in this bullshit place, I know first

hand.

[southernyankeebelle]

81. That's the problem until it really hits them in the face they don't recognize it.

[RKP5637]

82. And then it's too late. And the 'deer in the headlight' people say WTF, how

could this happen ... who let this happen?

[southernyankeebelle]

83. Yes indeed.

[etherealtruth]

4. Makes sense to me

Women are not equal and autonomous human beings with rights of self determination. Women are simply vessels for creating more men
Therefore, this law is sorely needed to keep women, that don't understand their place, in line.

Unfortunate, it appears there are those that actually believe this garbage.

[MineralMan]

5. I Forgot to Mention Men and Boys

They'll be covered by this new law, too, I'm sure, when it is proposed.

At the onset of puberty, boys will be registered with the Pregnancy Maintenance Administration. This registration will apply throughout their lifetime. At the time the legislation takes effect, all men will be required to register with the PMA within 30 days, and all men moving into Kansas must register within 24 hours of arrival.

The law prohibits all instances of masturbation by pubescent boys and men. To prevent loss of viable sperm cells due to this abhorrent practice, all men who do not have a fertile wife will report to their PMA facility for semen donations on a weekly basis. Semen will be collected using specially designed electrical prostate gland stimulation.

Semen collected by the PMA will be combined into the PMA Universal Sperm Bank stockpile, for use in case of war or natural disaster. In the case of war or natural disaster, all non-pregnant women in Kansas will be fertilized with semen from the PMA Universal Sperm Bank immediately at the first fertile time, based on their monthly menstruation calendar. Recognizing the importance of producing as many new Kansans in the case of these emergencies, the PMA Universal Sperm Bank will maintain fresh stocks of semen on a weekly basis. Mixing is performed to eliminate paternity lawsuits against mandatory donors.

[treestar]

13. They should do this

What will they do when they have so many Kansans that Kansas is no longer large enough to hold them all - they'll have huge cities and people in huge cities tend to be liberal.

[MineralMan]

15. Well, it would certainly keep Kansas women busy,

and in the traditional roles Kansas seems to want them to take.

Personally, if I lived in Kansas, which I don't and never would, I'd be shopping my resume around in other states and bailing from that prehistoric state and its attitudes.

What if everyone with any sense simply left Kansas? Now, there's a thought.

[treestar]

16. I do like the idea of wing nuts congregating in one state, too

I will encourage my local ones to move there.

[MineralMan]

19. A capital idea, indeed.

Let them all move to Kansas, and then build a mile-high wall around the state.

[wandy]

57. If we are real crafty about it we could get Glenn Beck to convience them.....

it was their idea!
It is his dream you know....
http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/lookout/glenn-beck-announces-plan-independence-usa-233854956.html
They would gladly build it. They would build the wall. They would maintain it .
Sure, we would loose some fine farm land but what the heck.
Think of the peace the rest of ous would have!

[proud2BlibKansan]

60. No thank you

It's bad enough as it is now.

[MineralMan]

75. Yes, it is,

isn't it?

[proud2BlibKansan]

86. That brings you joy, doesn't it?

[MineralMan]

92. No, it does not. However, I do not live in Kansas.

Were it not for Interstate 35, I would not even pass through Kansas, frankly. However, I-35 does exist, so I do pass through there from time to time. Not often, but occasionally. I even spend a night in Wichita once with a truck full of furniture and a noisy U-Joint. I fixed it in the parking lot of a Motel 6.

I do not live in Kansas, nor do I vote in Kansas. It is not a state I would choose to make my home. Reverend Phelps lives there, though, and apparently finds it to his liking. He once even ran in a Democratic primary for U.S. Senate there. He got 30% of the vote. Of Democrats in Kansas.

No, Kansas is not for me at all. Kansas is not for women, either. Kansas is for many things I don't like one bit, and is against pretty much everything I support. Not everyone in Kansas, of course, but enough that the state is governed by the right. I don't want the place I live in governed by the right. I work hard in Minnesota to prevent that, and did the same when I lived in California. My side didn't always win, but in sum, things went pretty well.

You live in Kansas, I presume, based on your screen name. That's your choice. It is not a choice I would make.

Here is the Kansas Congressional Representation:

SENATORS

Sen. Jerry Moran [R]
Sen. Pat Roberts [R]

REPRESENTATIVES
By congressional district:

1st — Rep. Tim Huelskamp [R]
2nd — Rep. Lynn Jenkins [R]
3rd — Rep. Kevin Yoder [R]
4th — Rep. Mike Pompeo [R]

Kansas voters elected each and every one of those people. Kansas is a Red State. There's no getting around that. Kansas voters vote as they see fit, and that's their right, but my right is to criticize that fact.

[cecilfirefox]

96. Yeesh, you know some of us do live in Kansas? I'm actually in Topeka,

I even get to see the 'church' here and there. We're trying man.

[MineralMan]

97. I know that many good people live in Kansas.

Apparently not enough, though, to change things. That happens in a lot of red states. I'm sorry that you are unable to change the politics in your state. Policies and elected officials are the ones who represent their state, and are elected by the people living in that state. When I mention Kansas, I am talking about official Kansas and its politics and actions. Official Kansas pretty much follows the pattern of other red states, in allowing the far right to impose regressive policies on people living in that state, and sometimes even on people who live elsewhere in the United States.

I don't like that. I don't have to like that. I will speak out against such things. Kansas is represented by Republicans completely in our national government, and Republicans hold a striking majority in its own state legislature and governorship. That is official Kansas, and that's what I'm satirizing in this thread.

[RKP5637]

79. Maybe Kansas can become the nut receptacle, so to say. Let all the nuts hang in one place! n/t

[Cleita]

35. You know the men and boys will be exempt from this.

It's only crawling up women's uteruses that they are interested in.

[MineralMan]

36. You know this is satire, right?

Maybe you didn't know that...

[Cleita]

40. I did. But you aren't addressing the reality that it's Kansas you are

referring to and there will never be a law, satirical or otherwise, to address the men's part in the real life pro-life legislative attempts at regulating women's fertility.

[MineralMan]

52. The laws ARE the men's part, you see.

It is men who are passing the laws. They're not left out at all.

[Keefer]

61. Maybe you don't get it...

if a woman doesn't want to get pregnant, she should keep her legs closed.

[Cleita]

67. I was told the only birth control pill I needed was

an aspirin between my knees.

[Keefer]

68. LOL nt

[11 Bravo]

55. I like the idea, but the first time the dipshit men who voted for this atrocity were told ...

to report for their monthly anal probe / semen delivery, I'm guessing the law would change really fucking quickly!

[MineralMan]

56. They'll do as they're told, dammit!

It's the law, innit?

[Phillip McCleod]

6. 'a modest proposal', but i don't doubt..

..there are many in kansas who think it really is a modest proposal.

[MineralMan]

7. That's the truly scary part.

Sadly, I think you're probably right.

[cali]

8. When we focus on this shit, we are playing right into the anti-choicers hands

this is just what they want. The personhood legislation is a red herring.

[MineralMan]

9. I disagree. I think the more we focus on it and

expose it, the more we understand what lies underneath it.

[cali]

10. you are so wrong. I know you mean well but

we, in the pro-choice movement, are absolutely being sidetracked by this. Numerous people in the movement are writing about how this is red herring stuff, while the TRAP laws are being passed, upheld and in some case not even challenged. That is the legislation that is crushing abortion rights.

This isn't actually a matter of opinion. It's about the facts.

[MineralMan]

11. And I'm writing something else.

Thanks for your concern.

[cali]

12. You're writing about something that is not a real threat

at least at this time, and lots of people are falling into the trap of focusing on this stuff while the anti-choicers pass legislation that is effectively destroying abortion rights.

but whatever.

[MineralMan]

14. Of course it's not a real threat. It's satire.

I doubt that many people will be focusing on my satirical OP on DU, frankly.

If they happen upon it, it's simply an extension of the stupid policies they ARE enacting to a logical conclusion.

That's the job of satire. Pointing out what a backwards place Kansas is, politically and from a human rights perspective is what I am doing, and I will continue to do similar things. It will not dilute the pro-choice movement. That's as absurd as my satire is. The absurd often reflects and engenders thought on the reality.

[kestrel91316]

66. Bull SHIT. It is not a red herring. It is the world of their dreams.

And you know it. Stop covering for them.

[cali]

88. oh for fuck's sake. what a stupid accusation. Covering for them?

Hardly. I post more about the threat to abortion right than any other person here. PERIOD. And I know more about what the actual threats are. TRAP. Inform yourself. Type cali and abortion into the site search and you will find dozens of my posts explaining what the real threats are along with dozens of links.

[99Forever]

17. Time to stop...

... capitulating and fight back yet?

[MineralMan]

18. I'd think so, yes.

This trend is very disturbing.

[MineralMan]

20. New Kansas State Motto

One Ovum, One Child!

[L0oniX]

22. Why can't all these crazy ass legislators move to Minnesota?

[MineralMan]

23. We'd tar and feather them and ride them out of town

on a rail.

[L0oniX]

24. I was just thinking that they would feel more at home with the bat shit crazy lady...

and the idiots who keep voting for her.

[MineralMan]

25. Michelle Bachman is one representative from one district

in Minnesota. My representative from MN CD4 is Betty McCollum. Go look her up. Our senators are Al Franken and Amy Klobuchar, both Democrats. Both of our state legislative houses have Democratic majorities. Our Governor is a Democrat.

None of our cities have been taken over by Emergency Managers.

Any more questions?

[L0oniX]

26. Ooooh touched a nerve ...sorry.

I have to deal with Floridah.

[MineralMan]

27. Then, maybe you should invite the Kansans there.

[patrice]

29. Don't you guess that being a grandparent of an unwed mother is a "Pro-Life" badge of honor here?

Last edited Sun Apr 7, 2013, 03:39 PM - Edit history (1)

Hypothesis: when it can be inferred on the demographic facts that middle-class cupcake culture will accept and even provide for its out-of-wedlock grandchildren; with church day-cares-alternative-schools for moms; with saintly $tatu$ con$ciou$ grandmas and grandpa dutifully taking up the financial slack in the mother and child's lives; while placing minimally acceptable baby-daddies in the baby-daddy play pen to gangsta-wannabe on weekends away from college or whatever job their church-fellowship networks dropped into their email; as "pro-life"-hero-mommies do what amounts to strictly limited-vocabulary/conceptual talk therapy with her BFFs at the mall; including other spouse-less mothers keeping marriage in the maybe-yes, maybe-no, maybe never, but at least most certainly not until the best meal-ticket shows up whether that's baby-daddy or not category; all under the pure unadulterated delight of the angel baby's visage bestowing authentic purpose and meaning to lives growing tired, thin and worn by too much of everything, including too much Jesus™ ... don't you bet those prospective young hero-mothers become somewhat indiscriminate and in-attentive about which alcohol-nourished hook-up gets her what she thinks is a free-ride because her WELFARE is sanctified by an out-of-wedlock baby in the right economic class?

So, if you were a potential "Pro-Life" heroic saintly grandma/grandpa, wouldn't you want some HELP maintaining which pool of potential babby-daddies might cross paths with your very nearly out of control partying potential babby-mommy and, THUS, some help maintaining the kinds of state aid that are available through churches and their various professional members, including your conveniently diagnosed "disabled" off-spring and/or their "disabled" offspring?

[patrice]

30. ^^Handmaid's Tale Cupcake Style^^

[MineralMan]

33. I confess that I do not see what your post has to do with

any of this, but there it is.

[patrice]

37. You don't get that is the CONSTITUENCY that makes what you're talking about politically possible?

I don't get why you don't get something so very obvious.

Do you live here?

[MineralMan]

49. Do I live where? Kansas?

See my profile.

[proud2BlibKansan]

62. So why are you jumping on Kansas? Lots of good people live here.

This state bashing is really not helpful.

Kansas was the center of progressive populism back in the late 1800s. The most widely read progressive newspaper was published here for many years.

Until the last decade, Kansas was known for its MODERATE republicans, like Bob Dole. But about 20 years ago, the crazy pro-lfers (mainly from California, that liberal heaven) moved here to take up camp across from Dr. Tiller's clinic in Wichita. They stayed, built a power structure, and have taken over the state GOP. That's what's going on in Kansas. It could happen anywhere, even in your beloved Minnesota. Never say never. We would never have believed this would happen here. But it has.

Instead of being an ass and making fun of Kansas, why don't you do something that is actually helpful? Donate to a candidate? Or to a union? (Since the public employees unions are now banned from payroll deductions for political purposes, we are collecting donations for them.)

But I'm probably just wasting my breath.

[MineralMan]

74. Uh, Kansas just passed a law declaring that personhood begins at conception.

Last edited Mon Apr 8, 2013, 09:50 AM - Edit history (1)

That is why I wrote this. Did that not happen? Is your Governor not going to sign that?

[proud2BlibKansan]

84. Sure hope he doesn't sing it.

Signing it is bad enough.

[MineralMan]

95. Oh, noes. I misspelled a word.

I was using my Kindle Fire. I hate touch screen keyboards. I'll correct the misspelling.

[patrice]

43. HOW, precisely, do you think the sorts of things you are talking about would happen? Or does that

not matter?

We're just supposed to engage in YOUR pure speculation for what purpose?

The actual state and its citizens don't matter to you? It's all about MineralMan gets to say whatever and nothing more.

[MineralMan]

50. The actual state and its citizens

elected the actual legislators and the governor who is going to sign a regressive bill into law. I know exactly how things happen.

[proud2BlibKansan]

63. No actually you don't.

Your replies show an ignorance of what is going on in Kansas.

[MineralMan]

73. Then perhaps you can explain the

Huge majorities held by the GOP in the Kansas state legislature. Were they not elected by fhe voters there?

[proud2BlibKansan]

85. There are moderate republicans and tea party republicans.

There are also conservative republicans who aren't affiliated with the tea party.

I doubt you have only one variety of republicans in Minnesota. Surely you aren't naive enough to think so.

What happened in Kansas is the tea party took over. They pushed the moderate republicans out of power in the legislature. Most of the moderates aren't too bad. Some have left the republican party and have become Democrats. My own state rep is a moderate republican. She's voted exactly as I asked her to vote on all of these bad bills.

[MineralMan]

89. Yes, well, I looked at the voting margins for that

"conception" bill. Sorry, but I'm not buying this. The bill passed, the Governor will sign it. Case closed.

[proud2BlibKansan]

90. So you're clueless

Of course he'll sign it. He's a right wing nut job.

My explanation was how it got passed. Perhaps you should read my post again.

Or do this. Take Bachman and put a movement behind her, enough people who believe as she does to take over the state legislature in Minnesota. That's what happened in Kansas. And if you think it can't happen in Minnesota, you're delusional. These nuts have been building their power base for 20 years. They are ready. If they can take over a moderate GOP stronghold like Kansas, they can take over any state. Don't forget that 4 years ago Kansas had a very popular Democratic governor.

[MineralMan]

91. The Republicans had control of the MN legislature for

two years. The people of MN voted them back out of out of control in 2012. Two years was enough time for the morons to piss off voters. They also voted in a Democratic Governor. Now, instead of right wing bills from ALEC, the legislature is about to vote on a marriage equality bill.

A state's legislature reflects the will of the voters of that state. If a Republican majority last more than one election cycle, then the state's voters are OK with it. I have a very good clue. I've seen the process in action many times.

[wandy]

59. Maybe I can help. Kansas would have a single parent lottery..

Every single parent would be required to sign up.
Once a month, Pink and blue ping pong balls would be selected randomly. One pink for girls one blue for boys.
The matching couple would be required to marry.
This solves the single parent problem and all of the other 'entitlement' problems that go along with it.

[Cleita]

38. Ask Sarah Palin. She should know all about it. n/t

[patrice]

44. One of my best friends is a homeless unwed mother. This shit REALLY pisses me off.

Most people have absolutely NO idea about profoundly the system is stacked against the poor. My friend lives in Missouri; they literally punish the shit out of her at EVERY opportunity and for as long as possible, including all of her future and that of her daughters whom she has NEVER given up on. Every positive thing she does, none of it matters more than revenge and punishment, just because she lost the birth lottery.

[Cleita]

45. I'm sorry for your friend and all other unwed mothers who have had to negotiate our

heartless system. I have known a few over the years myself, who had to struggle to support a child, with little or no help from the father and on women's wages.

However, Bristol Palin is not one of them. She has learned the art of the grift from her mother very well and I really think that if Bristol had not had that baby Sarah would have been at the forefront of condemning unwed motherhood with her policy of abstinence, a policy she forced Bristol to adopt even when Bristol had originally come out in favor of teaching teens about birth control.

[Cleita]

32. Or ejaculation? All those potential baby swimmers going

down the drain? Oh, but that's about men. We don't need any legislation for men except to make sure health insurance pays for their Viagra.

[MineralMan]

34. See my #5 above.

I added that.

[Manifestor_of_Light]

41. Ceausescu in Romania. The Kotex Police. It's already happened.

Ceausescu made mockery of family planning. He forbade sex education. Books on human sexuality and reproduction were classified as "state secrets," to be used only as medical textbooks. With contraception banned, Romanians had to smuggle in condoms and birth-control pills. Though strictly illegal, abortions remained a widespread birth-control measure of last resort. Nationwide, Western sources estimate, 60 percent of all pregnancies ended in abortion or miscarriage.

The government's enforcement techniques were as bad as the law. Women under the age of 45 were rounded up at their workplaces every one to three months and taken to clinics, where they were examined for signs of pregnancy, often in the presence of government agents - dubbed the "menstrual police" by some Romanians. A pregnant woman who failed to "produce" a baby at the proper time could expect to be summoned for questioning. Women who miscarried were suspected of arranging an abortion. Some doctors resorted for forging statistics. "If a child died in our district, we lost 10 to 25 percent of our salary," says Dr. Geta Stanescu of Bucharest. "But it wasn't our fault: we had no medicine or milk, and the families were poor."

http://www.ceausescu.org/ceausescu_texts/overplanned_parenthood.htm

[MineralMan]

42. Actually, I did know that. It was part of the basis

for this satire.

[meow2u3]

47. Let's call the personhood extremists "Ceausescu Republicans"

Red states: check.
Legislation that takes away women's autonomy: check.
Oppressive burdens put on women, but not on men: check.

That makes today's repukes commies and Ceausescu Republicans.

[JI7]

71. hell for women

[ismnotwasm]

46. I should send the Kansas legislature

A Retroactive bill for the cost of every used menstrual product for the past 30 years, saying I want reimbursement for proper burial. And I should forward all future such products to them, because I know they'll want to bury any potential soul--- on---them--

I would expect to reimbursed for safely shipping bio-hazardous products.

[MineralMan]

48. There's a great idea.

Truly.

[Paulie]

53. Your scenario is more likely than a gun registry

Talibakansas

[MineralMan]

54. It will be a womb registry.

Sadly, it's not quite as far-fetched as I would wish.

[Brigid]

70. Here is the title for MineralMan's screenplay.

[Brigid]

69. You have the makings of a scary movie screenplay here.

[Warren DeMontague]

72. "Save The Preconceived Babies!"

http://www.geocities.ws/preconceivedbabies/




...


yes, this is satire. But only barely.

[RKP5637]

77. For Immediate Action: All unused sperm shall be sent to the Governor's Office. n/t

[dembotoz]

93. perscription tampons

have to regulate such things

[MineralMan]

94. Ah, but if you're pregnant, you'll need very few of those.

Stay Pregnant and Save!