Dear Ones, I think I may need help [View All]

[LiberalEsto]

Recently I posted that I was in a state of shock after learning that my older daughter got secretly married without telling us. I deeply appreciate all your caring replies.

I am hurting badly. I am afraid my older daughter has cut me and our other daughter out of her life forever.

Late last night my husband sent a very nice email to our new son-in-law sending our best wishes and asking about why they didn't tell us they'd gotten married. The young man forwarded the email to his wife, who went nuts. Not at her father, but at our younger daughter for telling us, and at me for enabling her sister. I could not believe the rage. I tried to tell her the younger daughter meant no harm, that she told us after several weeks only because she felt badly at keeping something this important from her parents.

My younger daughter only found out because her sister, while drinking heavily at a party, told my younger daughter's boyfriend, and demanded that he not tell his own girlfriend. But the guy felt he couldn't keep something that major about her family from his girlfriend.

Nobody forced the older one to tell the younger one's boyfriend. But she's enraged at him, her sister and most of all me. Given the depth of her anger, I am not sure that this situation can be repaired.

As I mentioned in my earlier post, I have been wondering for months whether the older one is bipolar, because of her intense mood swings and many other inexplicable behavior.